#098 Indecision (The X Files)

[xfirefly9x]

Title: Indecision
Fandom: The X Files
Characters: Mulder, mentions of Scully
Prompt: #098 Writer’s Choice: Indecision
Word Count: 281
Rating: PG
Summary: Mulder thinks about life-changing decisions.
Notes: Written for 100_situations

Why is it that when it comes to the life-changing decisions, I can’t make up my mind? Like this, for example. I have feelings for Scully and I want to tell her but at the same time I don’t want her to ever know.

I want her to know so I can relieve myself of this secret and not have to keep anything from her, but if I tell her, I’ll probably scare her away and I just couldn’t live with that. I need her in my life and if she left because of something I said, I’d be devastated.

Also, our friendship would never be the same if I told her. If she’d ever talk to me again, that is. I just don’t know what to do. The indecision is clogging up my vision, hanging thick in the air like the plague, maybe even thicker than that.

It’s ironic that I, Fox Mulder, whom has dedicated his entire life to finding out the truth, can’t even tell a girl how I truly feel. You would think that with a mission such as my own, I’d be able to confess easily. Or at least be less nervous than I’m feeling right now.

But I’m not. It’s not easy. In actual fact, it’s the hardest and most nerve-wracking experience of my many years.

I’ve considered letting it go and moving on with life as it is, but I need to know what she feels about me. If she feels the same way about me as I do her. And the only way to find out that is to tell her the truth about how I feel.

But is she ready to hear it? Am I ready?

Comments

[southoffebruary.livejournal.com]

I like this! Nice and angsty. I think you captured Mulder really well here.

I always wondered who made the first move, its supposedly Scully, but something tells me it was Mulder.

[xfirefly9x.livejournal.com]

Thanks! I actually wasn't sure about this one. So it's good to know it didn't totally suck!

As for who made the first move, well I'm stuck back at the end of season 5 before they've even gotten anywhere so I'm in the black about that.

[odakota-rose.livejournal.com]

That's so Mulder. I could practicaly hear him saying it as I read.

[xfirefly9x.livejournal.com]

Yay! This ficlet is becoming a huge hit! And I thought it was nothing like Mulder!

[odakota-rose.livejournal.com]

No it totally was, great job!

[xfirefly9x.livejournal.com]

Well, thanks again then! =)